Evening out with the girls.
Setting: Dinner
Troublemaker #1: Oooh, our waiter has a nice accent.
T#2: Where's it from?
T#1: Bristol, England.
T#3: How in the hell did you know that?
T#1: I asked when you were in the bathroom.
T#2: Wow, I was going to be really impressed with your accent knowledge.
T#1: I know, I should be on Jeopardy. Do you think we can order the waiter with our meal? What number do you think he is?
.....
T#1: The guy in the kitchen keeps winking at me, what do I do?
T#4: I saw you winking at him back, I don't know.
T#1: Well, what else am I supposed to do? Go into the kitchen to chat him up? Do you think he's cuter than our waiter?
T#5: You're the only person with a view of the kitchen.
T#1: Rroowr. Look how hot our waiter is. He'd make me scream in bed.
T#2: I think the other waiter is cuter.
T#3: Ooh, which one?
T#2: The one with the curly hair.
T#3: He looks a little like Seth from the OC.
T#5: Oooh, what's that sizzling dish? It smells so good.
T#2: I don't know, but if that hot oil spills on me, it's worse than third degree burns.
T#1: Our waiter has a cute ass.
T#2: No, I'll take the other one.
T#4: I don't think either of them are cute.
T#5: I don't think I can eat anymore.
T#3: I don't understand the concept of full.
T#4: Who decided that ordering three dishes apiece was a good idea?
T#2: You wanted to order the entire menu!
.....
T#1: Ooooh! I love filling out these little restaurant info thingies!
T#3: Who wants the last bite of jamon serrano?
T#2: Yes, the other waiter is definitely cuter.
T#1: This is like the 7th time the guy in the kitchen has winked. I bet he has a girlfriend, and does this with all the girls.
T#4: So what are you going to do about it?
T#1: I don't know! I'm all bark, no bite.
T#5: Write him a note and fold it up like a paper airplane and sail it into the kitchen!
T#1: And poke out someone's eye? Okay, help me think of something fun to write. But someone else has to give it to him.
T#2: How about complimenting him on the food?
T#1: Nah, I bet all the girls do it. Ooh, I know, "Say hi in person sometime," and then my phone number.
T#3: Sounds good to me.
T#1: But one of you have to give it to him, and I'm booking it out of here. Give me the car keys.
.....
T#3: Hey, where did she go?
T#4: Oh, there she is, all the way down the street.
T#5: Wow, she can run in those heels.
T#1: So, did you do it?
T#2: Yep, I handed him the note.
T#3: I can't believe the waiter actually stood behind you to see what you were writing.
T#1: I know! Maybe he thought it was for him. Maybe I should have given the note to him instead.
T#5: You should have written each of them a note.
T#1: And then I'd have been the whore who hit on the entire waitstaff!
T#4: I wonder when he'll call.
.....
T#4: Hey, there's the guy from the kitchen on the corner on his phone.
T#5: Maybe he's calling you already!
T#1: No, I bet he's calling his girlfriend. I knew I should have given the note to the waiter. That accent! I always choose the wrong ones. I'm breaking up with the kitchen guy.
T#3: Hey, the kitchen guy is waving to us. Everyone wave!
T#1: Can I check my landline messages?
T#5: Sure, here you go.
T#1: AAHHH! He left me a text message on my voicemail.
T#4: How did he leave a text message on your landline?
T#5: I want to hear his voice!
T#2: What did he say?
T#1: What is this text-to-landline service? All you hear is his voice saying hello, and then the rest is an automated voice saying, "I hope you liked the food."
T#3: That's all?
T#5: Maybe the rest of it got cut off.
T#1: It's not like I can read the rest of the text message off my landline.
T#2: So when are you going to call him back?
T#3: You should leave him a text message.
T#1: I'll call him on Monday.
T#5: I think you should text him tonight.
T#1: It's too soon!
T#4: He waited approximately 20 seconds before calling you. You can wait an hour, and it'd already be like you waited an eternity.
T#1: Who let me do this?
T#2: Honey, you did it all by yourself.

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