jeudi 23 juin 2005

Happiness in all shapes and sizes.

Yes, I love me my crossword puzzles so much that I have a weekly calendar featuring them.

When I woke up Thursday at FIVE AM (for the second night in a row) because the itchy sensations from my ginormous mosquito bites were just TOO much for me to handle, I decided that yes, perhaps I should go see the doctor to make sure that my leg wasn't about to fall off. I swear, I'm not exaggerating when I say that I was about to cry from a combination of the frustration of not being able to sleep and the sheer painful itchy factor. No more of this homeopathic crap for me. No more of this trying to suck-it-up-for-crying-out-loud-it's-just-a-couple-of-mosquito-bites bullshit. I wanted drugs, and I wanted drugs like TEN hours ago.

So I went to my doctor, and felt much gratified when she looked at my gigantic hive with a little bit of alarm. See, the biggest one was 15 centimeters by 10 centimeters. That is honking big, especially when you have NOT been scratching it (never have I ever demonstrated so much self-restraint - incidentally, the next biggest was eight cms in diameter). So she gave me some super-powerful topical steroids and some super-strong pills which have alleviated some of the pain, because my hives LAUGH at the mere suggestion of benadryl. And by laugh, I mean they get like ten times bigger. Did you know that some people can be allergic to topical benadryl? I feel like I'm one of those lucky people.

(I think the pills work quite simply because they knock you out, and if you're FORCED into sleep you can't really scratch now, can you?)

And then she told me, that in some cases, instead of building up an immunity to mosquito bites, some people actually get worse and worse reactions each time s/he gets new bites. And while she didn't say it, I feel that this culminates in anaphylactic shock. AWESOME. I AM SO LOOKING FORWARD TO IT.

If that's not nature's way of telling me I'm allergic to the great outdoors, I don't know what is.

Incidentally, lying on your back in attempts to take pictures of your inner calves so that you can derive great glee in scaring one's mother is a rather tricky task indeed. If you don't get the angles right, your leg looks fat. And there is no excuse for fat legs in pictures, bugbite covered or not.

And no, no matter how much you beg or whine, I am NOT posting pictures of my bugbites, because they're ugly and there are to be no ugly photos on this website.

But enough of my talking about how one day, there will be that fatal mosquito bite that will kill me. Let's move on to happier matters. Such as receiving large surprise packets in the mail!

Does any of that stuff look familiar? Think about it.

If it was possible to fall in love at first bite, I think I just might have. (That cookie in the bottom row on the left - it did not come broken, as the package was very well packed. Hello, would you like to pack up the rest of my apartment for me too?!) That was me tasting the cookie. And then the taste became half the cookie, then the entire cookie...

... And well, you can guess what I had for dinner last night (although no, I haven't gotten to the ale yet, because apparently having any amount of alcohol on all the anti-mosquito bite allergy drugs I'm on is supposed to be bad for you. Normally, I ignore this anti-mixing advice (hi! I drink my antibiotics with wine!) but this time, I decided to err on the safe side.)

No, I'm not suffering from an itch-induced delirium. I got TWO containers of cookies (hence, two pictures of cookies). Two glorious containers of cookies, which were better than described. A fantastic crumb, delicate and well, crumbly, but in a satisfying manner - no need to microwave, it's warm again here now! So be jealous, be so very jealous!

Really, DDJ, if only you didn't live in Wisconsin, land of the flesh-eaters (aka mosquitos) - I'd visit in a heartbeat, and just demand baked goods all day long. I could work, and you could cook. Oh wait. That totally goes against my philosophy of laziness. But regardless - thanks again darlin' - you've certainly made this girl's weekend!